Suplerative Simpsons: Sideshow Bob Roberts

I find it funny how the people on SNPP seem to differ wildly on their views on particular episodes. . The reviews section includes "terrible" and "SUCKED really, really, really bad" amongst the other reviews and some even seemed "offended" by the attacks on the Republican party.

Being a loopy fruity left winger I loved them. Though there were all soft satirical jabs. I fail to see how they could be offensive.

The basic plot of this episode is as follows: Sideshow Bob (my favourite Simpsons character of all time) is released from prison by Mayor Joe Quimby after some grassroots support for Bob is generated by a right wing talk radio host, Bob is then enlisted by the Republican party to run against Quimby in the latest mayoral election which he wins.

Some of the classic lines...

Barlow: Monty, I'm way ahead of you. If you'll just open that door you'll see the next mayor of Springfield.
[door opens to reveal a water cooler; everyone applauds]
[the cooler bubbles]
Senator: What'd it say?
Barlow: No, no, no, Bob. Bob, come in!
Bob: [enters wrapped in a US flag] A fine "Mahoke" to you all.
Hibbert: Why, he's even better.
Ranier: I agree. I like the human touch.

Bob: That was a big mistake, Bart. No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it.

TV Commercial: Mayor Quimby supports revolving door prisons. Mayor Quimby even released Sideshow Bob -- a man twice convicted of attempted murder. Can you trust a man like Mayor Quimby? Vote Sideshow Bob for mayor.

Barlow: Mayor Quimby, you're well-known, sir, for your lenient stance on crime. But suppose for a second that your house was ransacked by thugs, your family tied up in the basement with socks in their mouths, you try to open the door but there's too much blood on the knob...
Quimby: What is your question?
Barlow: My question is about the budget, sir.

Bart: You were just Barlow's lackey.
Lisa: You were Ronny to his Nancy!
Bart: Sonny to his Cher!
Lisa: Ringo to his rest of the Beatles!

And the best one...

Bart: We want the truth!
Bob: You want the truth? You can't handle the truth. No truth-handler, you. Bah! I deride your truth-handling abilities.
Judge: Will you get to the point?
Bob: Only I could have executed such a masterpiece of electoral fraud. And I have the records to prove it! Here, just look at these -- [pulls out binders and floppy disks] each one a work of Machiavellian art.
Judge: But why?
Bob: Because you need me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep down inside you secretly long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king. That's why I did this: to protect you from yourselves. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a city to run.
Judge: Bailiffs, place the mayor under arrest.
Bob: What? Oh yes, all that stuff I did.

Awesome Simpsons: Bart's Girlfriend

I watched The Simpsons today and was greeted with an awesome episode from season six: Bart's Girlfriend. It's been a while since I saw a cool episode, all the ones I seem to be seeing on TV are from the later and vastly inferior seasons. Meryl Streep guests stars as the eponymous character.

The basic plot is that Bart finds himself lusting after Reverend Lovejoy's daughter: Jessica. He tries to pass himself off as a nice boy thinking that'll impress her but he soon discovers that she is a bad girl whose antics far exceed his own.

Some cool quotes... (from SNPP)

Lovejoy: And now my daughter Jessica, who has just returned from boarding school, will read the same passage I just read. I noticed a few of you weren't paying attention.
Bart: [groans] Oh...
[Jessica walks up; a heavenly light shines upon her]
Bart: [gasps] Wow! There is a God!
[the light comes from a lighthouse outside]
Man: I'm telling you the light would work better if it pointed out to sea.
McAllister: Arr, shut up! I know what I'm doing.
[a boat crashes in the distance]
McAllister: Arr, I hate the sea and everything in it.

Lisa: Don't be so hard on yourself, Bart. It's not your fault Jessica doesn't like you.
Bart: Is it my hair? My overbite? The fact that I've worn the same clothes day in, day out for the last four years?

Bart: Excellent! You're incredible, Jessica: your throws, your catches, your spirals, and your loops -- it's like the toilet paper is an extension of your body.

Marge: Have you noticed any change in Bart?
Homer: New glasses?
Marge: No...he looks like something might be disturbing him.
Homer: Probably misses his old glasses.
Marge: I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities but then I'd be afraid of smothering him.
Homer: Yeah, and then we'd get the chair.
Marge: That's not what I meant.
Homer: It was, Marge, admit it.